rest=rust.

never has there been a more true statement. it seems to be so relevant in my life these days. rest equals rust. basically use it or lose it. lately i feel like i've completely lost it. it's funny how you can go from running 14 miles no problem to struggling through 4 or 5. life has been a rollercoaster lately. and in my particular situation, a rusty rollercoaster that's stuck at the bottom of one of the harshest plummets or possibly even stuck at the top of an upside down loop. being stuck upside down can't be fun and in fact sounds quite nauseating. that's how i feel. both physically and mentally. i need to find the wd40 soon. because emotionally, i am drained. physically, i am unmotivated and it's starting to show in my thighs. mentally, i am so bamboozled i don't even know where to begin. i get distracted by every single problem that in my head i jump from one problem to the next and then back around to the first problem i started worrying about....

whoever said the twenties were the time of your life and to live it up lied. well, i guess that's not actually true. i'm having some times of my life. but why can't i live it up whilst being financially secure and feelings mentally and physically stable? i guess i can... i just can't. ugh.  indecisiveness will be the death of me.

MOTIVATION. GET AT ME. pleeeeeeeease. before i become a rusty useless pile of car scrap that nobody wants to look at and gets stuck on the side of a mobile home to eventually turn to red oklahoma dirt. not that that would be a bad thing... because who doesn't love them some oklahoma red dirt? just kidding. it would be bad. very bad.