eleven

happy new year!

new year, new me :) more to come...

turkey day

happy turkey day everyone!

im spending this day away from my family. minus all of my traditions i grew up with. i watched the macy's parade from a lonely cold hotel room by myself. there aren't smells of bubble cake wafting through the air. there was no turkey trot run this morning with dad. there will be no helping cut up veggies for stuffing or putting the marshmallows on the yams for me. there will be no organizing of a family photo. no, traditions are once again out the window this year. i have to remind myself that this is only temporary and that one day i will be able to continue these traditions in my own home with my family. until then, this will have to make due.

don't get me wrong, im not complaining. not one bit. i am well aware that i am doing what so many girls would kill to do. i am living my dream. i am doing what i love. i am performing and spreading christmas cheer. i am touching hearts and lives.

i am thankful to be doing what i love around the holidays. but i sure do miss home and my loved ones.

enjoy this holiday everyone. happy thanksgiving :)

love & other drugs

i can't wait to see this movie. it comes out tomorrow. going to be amazing i think. love a thought provoking movie.

my love & other drugs

she loves: side ponytails + boy short undies & tube socks + chocolate milk + cozy, comfy, sinky, swallowy couches + really soft hair you can run your fingers through with ease + cherry chapstick

she loves the words: elegance + revbev + futz + zoo + strut + sass-a-frass + lovebirds + delicious + fucklehead

she enjoys: long runs on the beach + live red dirt country music + baseball games & hotdogs + christmas tree ornaments + laughing to my abs achy

she dreams of: snuggling by a fire + a doggy to call hers + traveling anywhere & everywhere + family

myrtle turtle

there really is nothing i enjoy in the world more than a loooong run to clear my head. i truly believe that a 10 mile run can solve ANY problem. world peace really. an hour and a half of nothing but moving forward with your own power and strength. a good thought provoking playlist and something to think about. whatever the topic of the day may be, your mind will wonder from happy to sad to curious to frustrated to content to driven to any other emotion you can possibly feel. what a thrill. if you have never run more than 3 miles in your life, i HIGHLY suggest you get past that hump, because that's right when it starts to get good. that's when you start to feel on top of the world and like nothing can touch you. like youre the only thing that can stop you. youre the only thing that can bring you down. because in that moment, in that run, in that hour and a half, that is actually true. the only thing that can stop you is your mind and your body. not anyone, not anything. just you. its addicting, i swear.

i went for a run today on the beach in the dirty myrtle. 62 degrees outside. feeling like fall for the first time this year. clouds and a light mist. old couples bundled up for their afternoon/evening beach walk, holding hands. seagulls calmly playing near the waters edge. the wind blowing, the waves crashing. it was perfection. it was high tide, so running right at the waters edge where the sand is hard from the ocean is the way to go. i love the feeling of the rushing water rolling up so close to you as if it's trying to catch you on your race. such an incredible rush.

i loved everything about today.

last day of rehearsals at the waccamaw.

a tropical, sunny ambush of the ProBo cast.

a paper snowball fight.

an excellent run-through of a little Christmas show.

an incredible group of amazingly talented and wonderful women.

a PHENOMENAL woman we are privileged to call our director, grinning ear to ear.

an early release of 2 o clock, 3 hours early.

a york peppermint patty.

a pumpkin spice latte.

fall weather and warm pasta.

the aforementioned beach run.

strawberry blonde beer.

hair dye and some overdue roomie bonding.

what an amazing last day in myrtle beach. now its onto sunny florida! hello ft. myers, nice to meet you :)

get life. get going.

go. do. it. NOW.

making changes

"i must learn to love the fool in me--the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries." ---theodore isaac rubin

sometimes i feel like i forget how to be me. how to be the best, happiest version of myself. by the end of my last season, i was beaming. i was happy. i was on top of the word. this season, i am going to focus on getting back to that state of mind, back to that place in my life. i want to be that happy again, i want to live my very best life. i need to be healthy. i need to be the best that i can be at my job, as a friend, as a daughter, as a girlfriend, as me for me, as a person in general. i am going to review old blogs and channel that version of me. its very exciting people.

get. into. it. :)

its that time of year again...

Christmas starts tomorrow. :D get excited. i know i am.

Santa's got a brand new bag. i'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack :D

chat SOON!

the ups & downs

why do we as women give so much power to the male species? somehow they manage to control our thoughts & emotions & feelings & we just let it happen. why is it so difficult to be happy when you have so much good going on in your life, but yet you dont know what the man in your life is thinking & that brings you down from that cloud 9 you should be on... why can't we think like them and just not care and brush things off so easily. why is it so easy for them to not let one single thing we do affect their mood & day? they know it'll all be fine tomorrow. as is 99% of the time true. but we want answers. we want to know that it's all good NOW. not tomorrow. patience. ugh. why can we not keep that empowered feeling all the time and never let a look or a text or a phone call or a word or a statement get in our heads and get us down. why is that sooooo difficult for women? so up. so down. such a rollercoaster. dont get me wrong, it certainly keeps me on my toes, that's for certain... & i do love that thrill... but i just really wish my mood was not so easily affected. why do i have to care so much?

geez. just gotta shake it off. not worry so much & just live MY life. why is it so clear when i sit here & type it out or when i'm out on an afternoon jog? why can't i keep that clear mind allllll the time. i need to do more yoga i think. yes, that is the answer. yoga, running, pilates, dancing. they fix everything. me. me. me. it's all about me. remember it. dont forget it. play their game & win. you know you're worth that & deserve that & are wayyyyy better than that. so don't forget it. k? k.

in other news... i had a thrill of a weekend. whew.

to sum it up in a few short statements...

old no. 7 was my best friend.

old no. 7 was my caloric intake. total.

old no. 7 was my fun train.

locked doors. x2, 1 bad, 1 very VERY good.

lesbians with hands & pickup lines

carrie underwood compliments galore.

dum dums & gum.

baseball alumni in love.

doughnuts & m&ms.

sneaking out of windows.

a nice hot shower.

& a taco bell mexi pizza.

all in all, success in fun land was accomplished.

i do love life. the ups, the downs, the crazies, the happys, the dramas, the everythings.

i love it all.

toughen up

i have GOT to stop thinking so much. i have GOT to stop being such a girl. what is my problem. i'm about to ruin things for myself. who am i right now. take a chill pill. be yourself don't worry about everyone else. don't worry about anything. stick to your way of thinking and knowing everything happens for a reason. chill. out. be tough. don't be stupid. but at the same time don't let anyone make you feel you are except yourself. in fact, just don't let anyone make you feel stupid. you're not. sheesh. chill out.

a perfect night. or not.

Well tell me what you're starin' at

What it is, where it's at

I wanna know

Yeah I know what you'll probly say

You'll find your own way but I wanna hear you tell me so

So come down off your throne

Yeah we don't really wanna be alone

It's such a perfect night

A perfect night for losin'

A perfect night for fallin down

Perfect night for stayin somewhere else

Get me outta my head

What was the last thing that ya said?

I'm slipping over the edge and I don't wanna hear you tell me to pull myself back in

It's such a perfect night

Well I've been cursed, I have been blessed

And I admit I've been obsessed with you

Yeah I like how you can stand alone

You're bitter into the bone, I know it's true

It makes me wanna be near you

Yeah just to see what you might do

It's such a perfect night

A perfect night for losin'

A perfect night for fallin down

Perfect night for stayin somewhere else

Get me outta my head

What was the last thing that ya said?

I'm slipping over the edge and I don't wanna hear you tell me to pull myself back in

It's such a perfect night